ONCE THEY KNOW YOU CAN HOLD A NO' ONCE THEY KNOW THAT YOU CAN ACTUALLY GIVE THEM A BOUNDARY THAT THEY CAN PUSH SAFELY UP AGAINST THEN THEY WILL RESPECT IT SO IF YOU CAN STAND THERE AND BE IN TOUCH WITH YOUR FEELINGS AND INSTEAD OF BEHAVING LIKE OH FOR GOD'S SAKE JUST GO AWAY AND THEN THEY'RE OFF HAPPY AND YOU'RE THINKING